Driving past his house. Ugh thoughts, memories. Most bad some good. I know everything happens for a reason...sometimes it just takes something spectacular to realize the reasons for things.I read through a blog from back in the day that spoke of me still having a desire to get back together with Chris. It is interesting because when we broke up I held onto the idea that we would eventually get back together someday. I no longer want this. I pray for him to be happy and now I am slowly forgetting him - little by little. I've realized that I can't put myself in that kind of relationship ever again. I was incredibly unfair and horrible to myself by staying with him and more so for believing in him and getting back together with him time and again. I deserve(d) someone who has the ability to reciprocate feelings I have/had and the kind of love I showed. Dancing to "you've had your chance so say goodbye....say goodbye." I have started focusing on me and other boys again. I take the time to relax mentally and push myself hard physically. It is time for me to be the selfish one for a change. Started school, new cam, new job, new car, new music, new home life, new activities, new friends, new boyfriends, new goals every Feb baby like clockwork. What was going on last Feb hmm? and then an IM today "oh how are you?" (now that the other chick i left you for didn't actually want me.) "Been good about not contacting you" lol.. well stay that way nigga no time for the old ones who only wanted me when no one else is/was around...prayers for the last 2 months to come and in other news.. look who's rightly having a baby! Awww. More lata, I have TOO much studying to do.
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